Where is my faith? As I studied this morning about Daniel’s, I cannot help but feel that I’m in a dark maze wandering around in search of a lost faith. Do I even know what I’m looking for? No, it’s as if I am running aimlessly down walled corridors in the dark looking for something that has no form. All the while, Christ is walking next to me saying, “Here, take my lamp and my map and the photo of your destination. Speak with me, I’ll guide you the whole way.” And yet all too often I brush Him off desiring to be the hero who receives the glory of finding it MY way all by MYSELF. And then often it is only when I hit a dead end in the corridor and I lose all hope, that I finally look to my side and utter a desperate and angry “FINE, FINE WHATEVER!” This is a direct quote from a 2 year old I know. Why is it she knows this frustration and these words? Because they are at the heart of who we are as humans.
And so I snatch the map and lamp and start out again. However, once I am almost sure about the right way to go, I thrust it all back in His hands and try it again my way. My way. Not His.
I want to change that. I want to be continually next to Christ pouring over His words with His lamp as my light. I want to be talking with Him, asking what He thinks about every turn. Not just when I hit a dark corner, but always.
What brings me to this confession of my lack of faith? I’m glad you asked. As many of you know, my friend Jenna (whose birthday it is today, Happy birthday friend!) and I have a desire that we believe it is from the Lord and not ourselves. We aspire to have a house geared almost solely to ministry and hospitality for women of all ages (but focused on students). We wish to have a place perfect for early morning coffee discipling (not about coffee—come on, I’m not that much of an addict!), bible studies, parties, crashing spots for the weary, and just a place for someone to listen and be pointed to Christ.
The dilemma: we have no house.
Yes, I understand, that that throws quite a kink in the whole vision. In fact, it’s the biggest and darkest corridor in our maze. Probably the second being that we have no 3rd roommate. We’ve seen a few houses we love, one in particular but money and roommates are necessary. Often, when I’m in situations like this I try to find every way to patch up the situation, MY way and in MY timing. So this time I’m sitting back. I’m taking Daniel’s example of combining wisdom and practicality with knowledge and rest in who God is. He will provide. He will show His glory. Not mine. John 3:30.
So if there’s anyone in Tallahassee who wants to join us in our maze of faith, please let us know. There will be dark times but I also believe there will be some of the brightest moments we’ve ever experienced. It will be a risk and an adventure! However, there is no need to worry! Because most importantly, we plan on staying with the Tourguide the whole time we are traveling. After all, it’s all for His glory, isn’t it? His.
I'll set my gaze on God alone,
And trust in Him completely;
With every day pour out my soul,
And He will prove His mercy.
Though life is but a fleeting breath,
A sigh too brief to measure,
My King has crushed the curse of death
And I am His forever.
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Praise You in This Storm
I was sure by now, God, that You would have reached down
and wiped our tears away,
stepped in and saved the day.
But once again, I say amen
and it's still raining
and as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain,
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away.
Chorus:
And I'll praise you in this storm
and I will lift my hands
for You are who You are
no matter where I am
and every tear I've cried
You hold in your hand
You never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm
I remember when I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry to You
and raised me up again
my strength is almost gone how can I carry on
if I can't find You
and as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away
Chorus
I lift my eyes onto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth
I lift my eyes onto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth
--Casting Crowns
and wiped our tears away,
stepped in and saved the day.
But once again, I say amen
and it's still raining
and as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain,
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away.
Chorus:
And I'll praise you in this storm
and I will lift my hands
for You are who You are
no matter where I am
and every tear I've cried
You hold in your hand
You never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm
I remember when I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry to You
and raised me up again
my strength is almost gone how can I carry on
if I can't find You
and as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away
Chorus
I lift my eyes onto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth
I lift my eyes onto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth
--Casting Crowns
Friday, May 29, 2009
Daniel's Resolve
“But Daniel purposed in his heart that he would not defile himself with the portion of the king's delicacies, nor with the wine which he drank; therefore he requested of the chief of the eunuchs that he might not defile himself.” Daniel 1:8
I can vividly imagine this scene. When the attractive, smart, and social Jewish boys (ages 15-18) were brought into the king’s court in order to be trained, Daniel and some of his friends were chosen. By the way, attractive, smart, and social were the qualifications from the king that were highly esteemed in order to immerse these Jewish boys into the culture. Sounds a lot like our culture, doesn’t it? As it started to dawn upon Daniel what was about to happen, he realized that right then and there he had to make a choice: to submit to the will of man or to submit to the will of God.
I believe that in his mind he saw no other choice.
On his knees Daniel “purposes” not to compromise. This verse speaks volumes of how to fight sin and live out godliness. Daniel’s outward change came from a very inward root. He was intentional. He was gentle. He was obedient. He gives no room for a foothold, just simply obedience.
Some of the literal Hebrew translations of “purposed” include: “to set, direct, direct toward, ordain, establish, found, appoint, constitute, make, determine, fix, to set his heart upon.” I especially like the last part, “to set his heart upon.” It reminds me of the phrase, “don’t put all your eggs in one basket.” That’s essentially what Daniel is doing here. He is putting all of his eggs in God’s basket. He is setting heart on one thing and one thing alone. That, my friends, is the only way we can truly stand up against the pressures and temptations of this world and culture.
So how do we live a “purposed” or “resolved” life? It starts with first a relationship with the Lord. If you haven’t believed or trusted Him as the Lord and savior of your heart. If you’ve never seen yourself as a sinner. If you don’t fall at His feet, offering your empty hands and praying for His grace to fill you, then you have no way of living a “purposed” life.
If you do have a relationship with the Lord, I believe that there are a few practical conclusions we can draw from this verse.
A Purposed Life is:
1. Rooted in God’s Word (Ps. 119:11; Ps. 17:4; Duet 6:6; John 17:17)
2. Reverently fearing God, not men (Ps. 19:9, Ex 20:20, Prov. 16:6)
3. Resting in the hope and promises of God (AKA, Faith) (Titus 1:2, Heb. 11:1, Heb. 3:14)
4. Regularly in prayer. (1 Thes. 5:17, Eph 6:18, Phil 4:6)
So how is your “resolve” going? If you’re like me, you may be trying to make it your own “resolve.” I am preaching to myself when I say that most importantly, give it to the Lord. Ask Him to give you a purposed life. Ask for His power and strength,.
“And if the Lord is for us, who can be against us?”
I can vividly imagine this scene. When the attractive, smart, and social Jewish boys (ages 15-18) were brought into the king’s court in order to be trained, Daniel and some of his friends were chosen. By the way, attractive, smart, and social were the qualifications from the king that were highly esteemed in order to immerse these Jewish boys into the culture. Sounds a lot like our culture, doesn’t it? As it started to dawn upon Daniel what was about to happen, he realized that right then and there he had to make a choice: to submit to the will of man or to submit to the will of God.
I believe that in his mind he saw no other choice.
On his knees Daniel “purposes” not to compromise. This verse speaks volumes of how to fight sin and live out godliness. Daniel’s outward change came from a very inward root. He was intentional. He was gentle. He was obedient. He gives no room for a foothold, just simply obedience.
Some of the literal Hebrew translations of “purposed” include: “to set, direct, direct toward, ordain, establish, found, appoint, constitute, make, determine, fix, to set his heart upon.” I especially like the last part, “to set his heart upon.” It reminds me of the phrase, “don’t put all your eggs in one basket.” That’s essentially what Daniel is doing here. He is putting all of his eggs in God’s basket. He is setting heart on one thing and one thing alone. That, my friends, is the only way we can truly stand up against the pressures and temptations of this world and culture.
So how do we live a “purposed” or “resolved” life? It starts with first a relationship with the Lord. If you haven’t believed or trusted Him as the Lord and savior of your heart. If you’ve never seen yourself as a sinner. If you don’t fall at His feet, offering your empty hands and praying for His grace to fill you, then you have no way of living a “purposed” life.
If you do have a relationship with the Lord, I believe that there are a few practical conclusions we can draw from this verse.
A Purposed Life is:
1. Rooted in God’s Word (Ps. 119:11; Ps. 17:4; Duet 6:6; John 17:17)
2. Reverently fearing God, not men (Ps. 19:9, Ex 20:20, Prov. 16:6)
3. Resting in the hope and promises of God (AKA, Faith) (Titus 1:2, Heb. 11:1, Heb. 3:14)
4. Regularly in prayer. (1 Thes. 5:17, Eph 6:18, Phil 4:6)
So how is your “resolve” going? If you’re like me, you may be trying to make it your own “resolve.” I am preaching to myself when I say that most importantly, give it to the Lord. Ask Him to give you a purposed life. Ask for His power and strength,.
“And if the Lord is for us, who can be against us?”
Monday, May 25, 2009
What Do I Know of Holy?
I'm just going to let you know right now that I LOVE MUSIC. Music is a way that I communicate. It's the way that I express myself and contribute to the world around me. It is often times music lyrics that grab my attention and point me to Christ and what He has done for me. All that to say, there will be many song lyrics, blogs about songs, songs that made me happy, songs that made me think on this page.
This song in particular is probably the most meaningful song I've ever heard. While driving home one weekend from school, the words started to echo in my head as I realized it was playing in my car. I had never heard the song before; the CD had been given to me that day. But as the words started to seep into my mind, I had to play it over and over again as to let it bathe me in understanding.
"What Do I Know of Holy?" paints the picture of humankind but especially of our american culture. We walk around thinking we have God figured out, that we can put Him in a nice neat packaged box with a ribbon and yet we have NO idea who He really is. We are merely standing at His shoreline. My favorite part probably comes from being raised in the church and the deadly apathy that can sometimes accompany years of Sunday School. The songwriter says "I guess I thought that I had figured You out, I knew all the stories and I learned to talk about how You were mighty to save but those were only empty words on a page!" Oh how I pray that we, as believers, will wake up to who God is and the little of His holiness that we are able to grasp and in turn live out our knowledge for the world to see.
One more thing, are you hurting? "Come to Him all who are weary and He will give you rest." God doesn't ask us not to hurt. He doesn't ask us to swallow it and walk through our day with a Barbie smile plastered across our face. He simply asks us to bring that hurt to Him. Why? He wants to bind up our wounds. "What do we know of wounds that will heal our shame?"
This song should be playing in the little Ipod on the blog but you can go back to it if you want to listen with the lyrics.
I made You promises a thousand times
I tried to hear from Heaven
But I talked the whole time
I think I made You too small
I never feared You at all No
If You touched my face would I know You?
Looked into my eyes could I behold You?
(CHORUS)
What do I know of You
Who spoke me into motion?
Where have I even stood
But the shore along Your ocean?
Are You fire? Are You fury?
Are You sacred? Are You beautiful?
What do I know? What do I know of Holy?
I guess I thought that I had figured You out
I knew all the stories and I learned to talk about
How You were mighty to save
But those were only empty words on a page
Then I caught a glimpse of who You might be
The slightest hint of You brought me down to my knees
(CHORUS)
What do I know of You
Who spoke me into motion?
Where have I even stood
But the shore along Your ocean?
Are You fire? Are You fury?
Are You sacred? Are You beautiful?
What do I know? What do I know of Holy?
(CHORUS 2)
What do I know of Holy?
What do I know of wounds that will heal my shame?
And a God who gave life "its" name?
What do I know of Holy?
Of the One who the angels praise?
All creation knows Your name
On earth and heaven above
What do I know of this love?
(CHORUS)
What do I know of You
Who spoke me into motion?
Where have I even stood
But the shore along Your ocean?
Are You fire? Are You fury?
Are You sacred? Are You beautiful?
What do I know? What do I know of Holy?
What do I know of Holy?
What do I know of Holy?
This song in particular is probably the most meaningful song I've ever heard. While driving home one weekend from school, the words started to echo in my head as I realized it was playing in my car. I had never heard the song before; the CD had been given to me that day. But as the words started to seep into my mind, I had to play it over and over again as to let it bathe me in understanding.
"What Do I Know of Holy?" paints the picture of humankind but especially of our american culture. We walk around thinking we have God figured out, that we can put Him in a nice neat packaged box with a ribbon and yet we have NO idea who He really is. We are merely standing at His shoreline. My favorite part probably comes from being raised in the church and the deadly apathy that can sometimes accompany years of Sunday School. The songwriter says "I guess I thought that I had figured You out, I knew all the stories and I learned to talk about how You were mighty to save but those were only empty words on a page!" Oh how I pray that we, as believers, will wake up to who God is and the little of His holiness that we are able to grasp and in turn live out our knowledge for the world to see.
One more thing, are you hurting? "Come to Him all who are weary and He will give you rest." God doesn't ask us not to hurt. He doesn't ask us to swallow it and walk through our day with a Barbie smile plastered across our face. He simply asks us to bring that hurt to Him. Why? He wants to bind up our wounds. "What do we know of wounds that will heal our shame?"
This song should be playing in the little Ipod on the blog but you can go back to it if you want to listen with the lyrics.
I made You promises a thousand times
I tried to hear from Heaven
But I talked the whole time
I think I made You too small
I never feared You at all No
If You touched my face would I know You?
Looked into my eyes could I behold You?
(CHORUS)
What do I know of You
Who spoke me into motion?
Where have I even stood
But the shore along Your ocean?
Are You fire? Are You fury?
Are You sacred? Are You beautiful?
What do I know? What do I know of Holy?
I guess I thought that I had figured You out
I knew all the stories and I learned to talk about
How You were mighty to save
But those were only empty words on a page
Then I caught a glimpse of who You might be
The slightest hint of You brought me down to my knees
(CHORUS)
What do I know of You
Who spoke me into motion?
Where have I even stood
But the shore along Your ocean?
Are You fire? Are You fury?
Are You sacred? Are You beautiful?
What do I know? What do I know of Holy?
(CHORUS 2)
What do I know of Holy?
What do I know of wounds that will heal my shame?
And a God who gave life "its" name?
What do I know of Holy?
Of the One who the angels praise?
All creation knows Your name
On earth and heaven above
What do I know of this love?
(CHORUS)
What do I know of You
Who spoke me into motion?
Where have I even stood
But the shore along Your ocean?
Are You fire? Are You fury?
Are You sacred? Are You beautiful?
What do I know? What do I know of Holy?
What do I know of Holy?
What do I know of Holy?
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Heaven
There are few experiences in my life that have been so beautiful as that night. Being away at school here the past 2 months has certainly been challenging. There are good days and there are bad days. Often, I have noticed that the bad days outnumber the good. Even so, God has been teaching me that leaning back and resting in Him is the best way to combat these testing times. One such night while lying awake at midnight, I decided to play a song by Phil Wickham that was on my Ipod. "Beautiful" is the name of the song and it also contains “It is Well with My Soul” in the midst of it. Music has been my backbone lately and it has blessed my soul so much this past few weeks. As I listened, something moved me to an action that I, shamefully, haven't taken for a long time...my knees. As I sat on my knees against my bed I cried yet again. And finally, since I've been here, they weren't tears of pain and sadness, but of joy. Joy in my Creator. Joy in where He is leading me. Joy that my life isn't mine...it's my Beautiful Savior's.
The song has a whole concert of people singing. Have you ever noticed that when a large group of people sing, it is beautiful no matter what? It's one voice in a wonderful tone that doesn't require perfect pitch or even a well trained voice...it just blends to make something fantastic. As I listened to this song I wondered, “is that how God hears it?” I wonder if sometimes He only hears one massive, collective, and beautiful voice of all His saints that, though they are all around the globe singing in hundreds of different languages and thousands of different songs, they come together in perfect harmony of His praise.
Suddenly all I want to do is listen and sing to the Lord. I feel as though tonight I caught a glimpse of Heaven. And for once I really mean that. Not "heavenly chocolate" or "heavenly comfort" but the true Heaven where with one voice we will live in constant praise of our Lord and since that's what we are created for, it will be the fullest joy we've ever experienced...
Download this and then listen to the song Beautiful. It has to be played in your headphones, though. Eyes shut or better yet, in darkness.
His whole CD is free at www.philwickham.com
The song has a whole concert of people singing. Have you ever noticed that when a large group of people sing, it is beautiful no matter what? It's one voice in a wonderful tone that doesn't require perfect pitch or even a well trained voice...it just blends to make something fantastic. As I listened to this song I wondered, “is that how God hears it?” I wonder if sometimes He only hears one massive, collective, and beautiful voice of all His saints that, though they are all around the globe singing in hundreds of different languages and thousands of different songs, they come together in perfect harmony of His praise.
Suddenly all I want to do is listen and sing to the Lord. I feel as though tonight I caught a glimpse of Heaven. And for once I really mean that. Not "heavenly chocolate" or "heavenly comfort" but the true Heaven where with one voice we will live in constant praise of our Lord and since that's what we are created for, it will be the fullest joy we've ever experienced...
Download this and then listen to the song Beautiful. It has to be played in your headphones, though. Eyes shut or better yet, in darkness.
His whole CD is free at www.philwickham.com
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